Howard’s Johnson….

To quote the Bangles, “It’s just another manic Monday.”

A long time ago, I came to the conclusion that my job is really incredibly stupid in the grand scheme of things.  I don’t do anything that could be considered meaningful or purposeful.  There is no one will look back on my body of work and say, “Wow, her career achievements have really made a difference in this world!”

I made peace with this a long time ago, so it’s not a life altering epiphany at this point.

For some people, their work is their life’s passion.  For other’s, myself included, it’s just a necessary evil.  I intend to retire as soon as possible and never look back.

Until then, I will amuse myself and maybe a few others, by finding a bit of comic relief in the absurdity of my profession.

Case in point:

I interviewed a candidate for a job today who ended almost every one of his sentences with….“and shit.”

As in:

“I was responsible for customer service….and shit.”

“I don’t really enjoy sitting behind a desk….and shit.”

At one point I asked, “Have you ever interviewed for a job before….(under my breath….and shit)?

To which he replied, “Well, back in the day, when I was in high school….and shit….I had a bunch of part-time jobs….and shit….but these last few years I been working mostly for friends….and shit.”


Once that was over, I returned to my seemingly never ending trail of emails and was intrigued to see one from  I hadn’t been contacted by someone’s penis since college, so I was intrigued.

But, it was just a guy named Howard Johnson who was inquiring about a job opening and totally lacking in the self-awareness that might make him think twice before using the tongue in cheek play on his name “Howie’s Johnson” to apply for a job.  I mean, that’s not even really that creative….and what grown man calls himself Howie?

Since he didn’t include a greeting or a signature in his message, I responded as follows:

Dear Howie’sJohnson@….


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